Texting - Usagi Would Cry

From Radiant Heart MUSH

Texting - Usagi Would Cry
Date of Scene: 15 August 2023
Location: Texts
Synopsis: Naru texts Darien about his magic-teaching comments in Everything at Steak.
Cast of Characters: Mamoru Chiba, Naru Osaka


(PHONE) Naru Osaka texts: I didn't think you could teach magic.
(PHONE) Mamoru Chiba texts: I was talking about sleight of hand and generally being a magician, you know, producing flowers from thin air and stuff
(PHONE) Mamoru Chiba texts: ... ... ...
(PHONE) Naru Osaka texts: Alas. Not nearly as fascinating as it first sounded. Although you /are/ good at producing a hat from thin air.
(PHONE) Naru Osaka texts: Why are you ... ... ... at me?
(PHONE) Mamoru Chiba texts: I can teach *a* kind of real magic.
(PHONE) Naru Osaka texts: Again. I didn't think that was something that could be taught.
(PHONE) Mamoru Chiba texts: It is. It involves using negative energy. It's... Usagi would cry.
(PHONE) Naru Osaka texts: Usagi cries a lot. She's very good at it, but it's part of why we love her.
(PHONE) Mamoru Chiba texts: I'm in the mess I'm in because of it, and I'm trying to angle Usagi crying in horror as sort of a morality chain right at this second, because all I can think of is that obviously I have to teach you, and you'll get good at it really fast, and as long as I don't introduce you to the others then you won't be in danger of being recruited and you can help me get out.
(PHONE) Naru Osaka texts: That's a lot to unpack in one text. I'm not generally in favour of plans that make Usagi cry. There's not much obviously in teaching me anything. I don't think I would get good at it really fast, but I will help you get out if you need me to.
(PHONE) Mamoru Chiba texts: Of course you'd get good really fast. You see things other people don't, you figure things out when other people can't, and your aim is fantastic. But I think you'd be better off finding another path, which you would also get good at really fast.
(PHONE) Naru Osaka texts: My own path, positive, negative or otherwise, aside. How else do I help you?
(PHONE) Mamoru Chiba texts: I don't know. Things are in a holding pattern right now. I don't know which way things are likely to fall over first.
(PHONE) Mamoru Chiba texts: Wait
(PHONE) Naru Osaka texts: A lot of things feel like they are uncertain right now. Waiting for a shoe to fall, so to speak.
(PHONE) Mamoru Chiba texts: you and usagi and koji all have pieces of what's wrong with me. takashi has a lot, but i think he would guard them for me, and i can't ask him to tell because that would be suspicious.
(PHONE) Mamoru Chiba texts: but you three, and kazuo because i need him and you're friends with him
(PHONE) Mamoru Chiba texts: you can put your heads together.
(PHONE) Naru Osaka texts: I don't know Takashi very well, so walking up to him and asking him to divulge all of your deep dark secrets would probably raise his suspicions, yes.
(PHONE) Mamoru Chiba texts: In other words you can help by sharing information around. And finding out everything you can. and keep being friends with Kazuo. because i need him but i don't want him to get got.
(PHONE) Mamoru Chiba texts: I am a very needy person. Feel free to tell me if I'm being selfish, because I can't tell.
(PHONE) Naru Osaka texts: I've spent a lifetime with Usagi. It's a different flavour of needy, but it's okay. I'll push back if I have to.
(PHONE) Naru Osaka texts: Why do you need Kazuo?
(PHONE) Mamoru Chiba texts: because ... because he's safe. and
(PHONE) Mamoru Chiba texts: i feel like i should know him, when i don't really even know myself anymore
(PHONE) Naru Osaka texts: Does he know you the same way? Or did he know you before?
(PHONE) Mamoru Chiba texts: i can't tell. i can't read him, it feels like everything is skewed left a little bit when i'm trying to talk with him.
(PHONE) Naru Osaka texts: I wonder if things are actually skewed straight rather than the familiar off kilter. He is a steady presence. (I value him for that, myself.)
(PHONE) Naru Osaka texts: I also get the sense that it is easier for you to talk by text than in person. If I'm wrong, we can meet for coffee.
(PHONE) Mamoru Chiba texts: Thanks for not treating my Saitou-san weirdness as as weird as it probably actually is. And it's easier to talk by text, yes. I'm trying to come up with all the reasons that's true and then deleting them.
(PHONE) Naru Osaka texts: If the last short while has taught me nothing else, just embracing the weird has been top of the list. Your Saitou-san-weird isn't even making my top ten at the moment.
(PHONE) Mamoru Chiba texts: Thanks for that, too. XD And fair warning, I might forget we had this conversation. I'm definitely deleting it off my phone.
(PHONE) Naru Osaka texts: Will you believe me if I tell you it happened later?
(PHONE) Mamoru Chiba texts: Probably. Unless I'm really out there, which means there'd be bigger problems than me not remembering this conversation.
(PHONE) Mamoru Chiba texts: That sounds dire and overdramatic doesn't it?
(PHONE) Naru Osaka texts: A year ago? Yes. Now? Sounds like Tuesday.
(PHONE) Mamoru Chiba texts: Sorry.
(PHONE) Naru Osaka texts: There are already bigger problems than you, and your memory and all the rest of the things you're trying to apologize for. You are, within the limits of what you can, trying to make there be fewer things you feel you have to apologize for. You're good. <3
(PHONE) Mamoru Chiba texts: Thanks. <3 Hey, maybe I can help with the problems bigger than me!
(PHONE) Naru Osaka texts: That sounds like a spectacular plan!
(PHONE) Naru Osaka texts: And thank you. For fighting what you know isn't rightfully you and being as open as you can. It's hard to do, and I'm proud of you for doing it.
(PHONE) Mamoru Chiba texts: What can I do to help? (Thank you.)
(PHONE) Naru Osaka texts: I don't know yet. I'm still very firmly in information gathering on so many levels.
(PHONE) Mamoru Chiba texts: Fair! And again... you can ask me anything you like, I just might not answer some.
(PHONE) Naru Osaka texts: Based on our conversations, I'm trying to be very judicious in what questions I ask.
(PHONE) Mamoru Chiba texts: Also fair! I'm disappointed, but maybe that means you're right to be cautious.
(PHONE) Naru Osaka texts: My own position feels.. precarious and tenuous. I'm probably overthinking things, by a lot.
(PHONE) Mamoru Chiba texts: I don't know. I don't think I remember a time where I didn't feel like I was on a tightrope while juggling chainsaws on fire, so as far as I know, you're not overthinking things? :D one of the reasons i feel better texting is that it seems unsafe to be seen with me alone. i keep feeling like my own people are spying on me. i don't want you getting targeted for yet another reason, you know? sailor moon can't always be there.
(PHONE) Naru Osaka texts: We've already touched on your /amazing/ memory, so you not remembering something could just mean it was last week y'know. :) But I hear you. I don't feel especially targeted, for the record. I'm trying not to be scared of leaving the house.
(PHONE) Mamoru Chiba texts: ... that is true. My god my memory is phenomenal. XD But yeah, you and Usagi-chan are both trouble magnets. I think Chiyo and Koji are, too. Don't be scared of leaving the house, but to be on the safe side, yes texting and then me deleting.
(PHONE) Naru Osaka texts: I think we have an entire school of trouble magnets. Because someone thought /that/ was a good idea.
(PHONE) Mamoru Chiba texts: BTW I do really like Usagi-chan. Like, really like.
(PHONE) Mamoru Chiba texts: Yeah SOMEONE was a genius.
(PHONE) Naru Osaka texts: As awesome as you are on your own merits, I'm even more invested in helping you because Usagi really likes you back.
(PHONE) Mamoru Chiba texts: hahahaha, as her best friend, are you allowed to *tell* me that? XD i guess it's safe because i admitted it first. or maybe that's just manga rules.
(PHONE) Naru Osaka texts: If you haven't figured it out by now, you are seriously not paying attention.
(PHONE) Mamoru Chiba texts: no, i figured she did, but i was still startled at how boldly presented the information was XD XD XD
(PHONE) Naru Osaka texts: I'm only coy about information about some things. If it's already a known fact, there's no reason to be all silly about it. :)
(PHONE) Mamoru Chiba texts: I deeply appreciate your pragmatism.
(PHONE) Naru Osaka texts: There is one pragmatic person in our dorm and she needs to be pragmatic enough for both.
(PHONE) Mamoru Chiba texts: Which reminds me. i don't know if i told you. i think i told usagi-chan.
(PHONE) Mamoru Chiba texts: don't tell me if anyone is a magical girl or boy. that's DEFINITELY something i DON'T need to know. in fact i need to NOT know
(PHONE) Naru Osaka texts: Yes, you mentioned it. I've been trying to be quite careful about not saying one way or another. Nor implying it, one way or another. Which does limit some lines of questions, for the record.
(PHONE) Mamoru Chiba texts: Does it? How?
(PHONE) Naru Osaka texts: Questions that really only come from experience, or lack of experience. That would give a lot of clues by implication, and you've been emphatic enough that I am trying to curtail those.
(PHONE) Mamoru Chiba texts: i just assume everyone i know is a trouble magnet who remembers magic but doesn't have any way of defending themselves if magic comes at their faces again. it's not like you all don't get hurt enough :P also, i've been in this for two years, as far as i know, and i really only know of a couple of girls that've been around for a while. if by 'a while' i mean that sailor v started not too long after my memories start. so experience is less of a thing than you think.
(PHONE) Naru Osaka texts: Interesting. Yes.. experience is clearly a lot less of a thing than I think. Memories are weird things, though. Your own memory issues aside.
(PHONE) Mamoru Chiba texts: I remember Sailor V starting to get active very well.
(PHONE) Mamoru Chiba texts: But how do you mean about memories being weird things?
(PHONE) Naru Osaka texts: They are slippery, and the line between dream and memory and recollection and building it from a prompt like a photo is much more hazy than most people admit. Or realize. Or perhaps we all have memory issues.
(PHONE) Mamoru Chiba texts: You've gone exceptionally vague, and I can't tell if I've bored you into philosophizing or if you're trying to say something else. :V If you're not talking about my own memory issues, are you talking about something you think you remember but don't really? Or--?
(PHONE) Naru Osaka texts: I have gone vague, I'm sorry. (also philosophizing is never a sign of boredom, I indulge happily). I remember things that might have been dreams, but have too much substance to them and photographs that show I was there, but that I dont remember anything but what the photograph tells me. It is why I say memories are slippery and hazy things, not just for you.
(PHONE) Mamoru Chiba texts: ... recent, or from when you were tiny?
(PHONE) Naru Osaka texts: Recent. (And tiny too, but I don't expect to remember details of photos from when I was tiny, that seems reasonable).
(PHONE) Mamoru Chiba texts: Your family's store?
(PHONE) Naru Osaka texts: That's a common place for dreams and memories, yes.
(PHONE) Mamoru Chiba texts: And photographs that show you were there that you don't remember otherwise?
(PHONE) Naru Osaka texts: Those ones are less recent and rarer. Probably just my own poor memory peeking out. It's not concerning, per se, just odd and came to mind when I was waxing poetic and philosophical on the notion of memory.
(PHONE) Mamoru Chiba texts: I see. I'm sorry I'm so quick to assume any given subject is related to bad things happening. ^^;
(PHONE) Naru Osaka texts: It might yet be, but I've decided that it's harmless. That might bite me in the butt later.
(PHONE) Mamoru Chiba texts: I don't know if I dream. Statistically I probably do.
(PHONE) Naru Osaka texts: It's not super uncommon to not remember your dreams. I absolutely dream, quite vividly. Soemtimes entirely too vividly and too much realism. Sometimes I think things would be more restful if I didn't.
(PHONE) Mamoru Chiba texts: Maybe they would. But I've also heard it's not healthy if you don't dream, which seems unfair. On the other hand, I'm glad I don't remember nightmares, whether or not I have them.
(PHONE) Naru Osaka texts: Can confirm, nightmares suck when you remember them.
(PHONE) Naru Osaka texts: I think you'd be in pretty rough shape if you didn't dream at all, remembering them is something totally different. I should look that up.
(PHONE) Mamoru Chiba texts: If you figure out who I really am
(PHONE) Mamoru Chiba texts: it's okay if you tell on me
(PHONE) Naru Osaka texts: I don't need to know who you really are to google if not dreaming is ruining your mental health.
(PHONE) Naru Osaka texts: Or if you probably dream and don't remember them. Which seems more likely. Perhaps your brain is trying to save you from yourself.
(PHONE) Mamoru Chiba texts: Come on, statistically I probably do actually dream.
(PHONE) Mamoru Chiba texts: maybe it is!
(PHONE) Mamoru Chiba texts: if so, it's hilariously late to the party
(PHONE) Naru Osaka texts: Yep. Probably. Your conscious mind is trying to save you from yourself, clearly your unconscious is doing its best too.
(PHONE) Mamoru Chiba texts: Oh I'm fine.
(PHONE) Naru Osaka texts: On some levels, absolutely. On others, most assuredly not. Which is alright.
(PHONE) Mamoru Chiba texts: I'm gonna keep it all right as long as I can. Time to delete and reboot my phone. Thank you for asking me things!
(PHONE) Naru Osaka texts: Thank you for telling me things. <3
(PHONE) Mamoru Chiba texts: <3!