View source for How Do I Even RTFM? (Rashmi Terios)

{{Cutscene Header
|Date of Scene=2023/07/27
|Location=Korma Chameleon, Rashmi's bedroom
|Synopsis=Rashmi has a Very Important Problem, and Nicomachea probably contains the answer! But even an Intelligent Device cannot answer a question that isn't asked.
|Thanks=Jaedite
|Cast of Characters=41
}}
*TMP*

The black globe sounded heavier than perhaps it ought to, as Rashmi set it on her desk. Possibly more creepy was the fact that it did not move, even though spheres and flat surfaces have a terrible time finding equilibrium. But that wasn't the strangest thing *about* the Black Jade, Obsidian's latest in home-assistant gadgetry.

The strangest thing was how the monster at Clover Mall ignored *everything* to try and reach them.

Dropping into her chair, Rashmi stared at the globe for a long while, as if trying to coax it to give up its secrets just by needing answers at it. Naturally, the gadget remained silent and unmoving. Frustrated, she removed Nicomachea from the cord around her neck, and stared into the red gem at the center of the charm.

<<Nicomachea,>> she thought, <<Could you come out, please? I need your help.>>

<< OF COURSE, MASTER, >> replied the Device, and Rashmi couldn't help but smile at Nicomachea's voice. Despite the obvious distortion and syntax problems, Nicomachea reminded her of a kindly old professor, preparing to deliver a lecture on his favorite subject. Which was great, lectures and learning were what she needed right now.

When the Device was finished settling into its active mode, she set the book next to the Black Jade, pages open. << I need to know what this thing is, Nico-kun. Something is weird about it, and I have a suspicion, but I want to be sure. >>

<< MASTER-- >> Nicomachea began, but Rashmi's nerves kept her 'talking.'

<< I need to analyze it, but I don't even know what I'm looking for. And I'm pretty sure the equipment I need doesn't exist on this planet. >>

<< MASTER, PL-- >>

<< And I don't even know if I could make sense of the numbers and math and spectrographic forensiwhatevers! I'm just a *kid,* Nico-kun! I'm okay at science and stuff but *I don't know what I don't kno--* >>

<< *BONG!* >> Nicomachea's chime was *loud* inside Rashmi's head, and did a fantastic job of derailing an anxiety spiral.  << MASTER. BREATHE DEEPLY. CLOSE YOUR EYES. COUNT TO TEN. >>

Flushing, Rashmi followed suit, shoulders sagging as a bit of the tension in them began to drain away, and Nicomachea continued speaking. << WHEN AN INTELLIGENT DEVICE IS DESIGNED, THE FORM IT IS GIVEN IS MEANT TO CONVEY MEANING AS TO ITS FUNCTION. SUBJECT 'Hanzo' TAKES THE FORM OF KNIVES.  SUBJECT 'Hanzo' IS OPTIMIZED FOR STEALTH AND INFILTRATION. >>

<< O... kay, but I don't understand-- >>

<< MASTER. I TAKE THE FORM OF A BOOK. >>

Silence, for a long moment, then a loud *smack* rang out in Rashmi's room, as palm met forehead. << ...So your specialty is information. So why all the powerup spells? >>

<< I TAKE THE FORM OF A BOOK. I AM ALSO CONSTRUCTED AS A *SUPPORT* DEVICE. >>

<< Then why aren't you telling me what I need to know?! >>

In Nicomachea's silence, lay the despair of a thousand, thousand philosophy teachers. << ...YOU ARE NOT ASKING THE RIGHT QUESTIONS, MASTER, >> he said finally, and it was *astounding* how much heavy, patient frustration one could display in a voice that lacked the ability to vary its tone.

Sitting back in her chair, Rashmi crosses her arms, staring from book to Black Jade and back, trying to figure out what question to ask that would give her the best answer. << So what you're saying is, it's like Google, I need to word my questions right to get *actual* good answers, not just barely-related garbage. >>

<< COMPARISONS TO THIS WORLD'S INFORMATION NETWORK ARE... INACCURATE, IF SEMANTICALLY VALID. MASTER NEED ONLY ASK THE QUESTION TO OBTAIN THE ANSWER. >>

Silence, for a good couple of minutes.

<< ...Nicomachea... do you *have* a way to analyze this thing? >>

*BONG!*

The pages glowed softly, and writing and diagrams sketched itself into being across the pages.

<< SUBJECT 'Nicomachea' INCLUDES A ROBUST SENSOR SUITE, STORAGE FUNCTIONALITY, AND DATA-TRANSLATION MATRIX. IF MASTER WISHES TO APPLY THESE TOOLS TO MAXIMUM EFFECTIVENESS, MASTER MUST LEARN HOW TO READ AND COMPREHEND THE READINGS TAKEN. >>

<< Nico-kun, >> Rashmi groaned.

<< MASTER MUST UNDERTAKE PROGRAM 'Summer School.' >>