1515/What do I gain

What do I gain
Date of Scene:	10 May 2024
Location:	Dorms #1
Synopsis:	Hinoiri decides to visit her best friend to discuss some recent developments... as well as get her advice on some things. In a strange twist nobody saw coming, she takes a good lesson from it.
Cast of Characters:	Hinoiri Kirara, Sayaka Miki

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Hinoiri Kirara has posed:
Hinoiri Kirara had returned from the past and... well... nearly lost someone incredibly important to her. It had made her think... about somebody else who meant the world to her. Which was why she was standing outside Sayaka's dorm room and giving a very light little knock on it.

Her first real 'friend' in this world. Sure, Usagi had been 'a' friend. But Sayaka had been there for her, even after knowing the truth. Accepting it. Accepting her. And... she wanted to tell her some things. Important things.

Sayaka Miki has posed:
Sayaka is currently surfing the internet, jumping from site to site looking for any all decorations that she could use for Hinoiri's impromptu birthday. She has been making good progress since then, and has even found the sun pinata Gretchen had suggested, though that hasn't been delivered yet.

"Hey, Ula, what do you think of this?", Sayaka says, showing the tiny mermaid a web page with a black and red leather jacket. Ok, that was a present and not a decoration, but still. "I think it looks good", the koi mascot says after getting closer to the screen. Screen that is abruptly shut when that knock at the door is heard.

Getting up from her chair, Sayaka gets to open the door, and she is very glad she closed the laptop since it's Hinoiri on the other side. "Hey, Hino!", Sayaka exclaims, inviting her to come in with a smile.

Hinoiri Kirara has posed:
Hinoiri Kirara gave a snall smile when the door opened. Being invited in, despite everything she'd done lately? Still felt kind of nice. "Hey. So... ummm..." She nervously walked in, reaching up to grab the back of her head. "I uhhhh... thought I should talk with you. About, errr... some stuff that has been happening lately."

Slow, deep breath. "So... Madoka knows, first of all. I... guess she probably told you. But hey, I figured I should share with you," she said sheepishly before taking a seat. "And uhhhh... I've been thinking a lot about some of the things you said... about when I go... home. And ummmm... I thought... we could chat about it a bit? If you don't mind? I know it's kind of short term, but... yeah... I figured..."

"... I put up another Eclipse Zone so... there's also... that. I should... clear up some things."

Sayaka Miki has posed:
Sayaka doesn't stop showing her a cordial smile despite the nervousism Hinoiri shows her and makes space for Hinoiri to walk in. She has heard of course about Hinoiri and Madoka arguing, and the way it happened has been an important part of her motivation to hold her a birthday party in the first place.

Though, she is a bit worried herself. Given that the last time something like that happened she had absolutely exploded at Hinoiri, is that what part of what is making Hinoiri nervous right now? That things could go the same way? No matter what has happened recently, it's really important that addresses the current events with lots of calm.

"I see", the bluenette tells her. "Yeah, we can do that. You can sit down if you want", she suggests waving behind her, with both a sofa and a chair at the table available. At the same time, she excuses herself for a second, coming back with a glass of water, in case Hinoiri wants to drink. At the same time, Ula tells Hinoiri "So, you have made lots of progress recently. Be on your guard when you go back."

Hinoiri Kirara has posed:
Hinoiri Kirara gave a small nod and, admittedly, took the water. She then glanced to Ula. "Be on my guard? Oh, don't worry, I alweays am. It's just, well..." She glanced up to Sayaka and took a drink of the water while she tried to find her words.

"... So. I got... tossed into the past. Recently. By Beryl. One of the... big bosses at Obsidian. She's... she's terrifying, actually. Tortured me once. She can't do that again, though. At the time, I was... weaker. I'm stronger now. I've been gathering power, she can't do it again.... and soon, I intend to cut ties with her entirely. The first Eclipse Zone was hers. The second... isn't. None of the power from it is going to her. It's going to another group. She's... well. She's a monster. At least as much as Kyubey. Possibly more. She needs to be stopped. But its... it has brought to light a few things."

"... Before, you mentioned I'd never be happy if I went home like this, right? If I... left. Do... you really thing that's true?"

Sayaka Miki has posed:
"I have heard of that", Sayaka nods. That portal has been something troublesome. Good thing Kyouka had intervened quickly to put a barrier around it. "It is so odd that you have only been gone two days", she adds. "Two weeks have passed while inside, right? That is creepy." She can't wrap her mind around their sense of time having been so out of tune.

The thought of Beryl having tortured Hinoiri really makes Sayaka frown. As if she wasn't despicable enough already. "I am saying nothing new, but she is a monster. I bet her heart is completely rotten. It's so freaky that you got tortured", she says, extending a hand to take Hinoiri's as a show of sympathy. "How have you been dealing with that?" She is afraid the answer to that is 'Not well'. Torture probably always leaves its scars, mental if not physical.

"Honestly", Sayaka adds, addressing Hinoiri's second question. "I can't say I have ever been in a divine position, but I would say the same thing to any of my friends. The thought of them turning into some high-ruling goddess, with the responsibility tying her down... I don't think it would be pleasant for anyone. I will accept if you ardently believe in it, but in your case it's all the more true since you will be a world away. Can you really adapt to possibly not being able to see your friends again?" she looks at Hinoiri, the thought still unpleasant to her.

Hinoiri Kirara has posed:
Hinoiri Kirara nodded. "Yeah. But... you know what? She's an idiot. She had the power to kill just about everyone there... instead? She sent all of us, including me, someone who, as far as she knew, was on her side? Into the past.... where I was able to learn her secret."

"She sold her soul to a demon and used it to get power. Without that? She'd be pathetic."

She did pull away, just a bit, when the hand was extended. "It... was fine. I'm fine." No she wasn't. But then... Hinoiri. "It can't happen again. She caught me off guard last time. She can't trap me again."

As for the rest of it? Well... she took a slow, deep breath. "I... think I can. But just because I've become that strong doesn't mean I won't be able to visit sometimes. Or you could come through with me on a visit. That's... acceptable," Hinoiri said with a small, sheepish smile. "I guess... I guess I've just... well..." Closing her eyes, she leaned back and then looked up at her. "Sell me on it. If I stayed, what would I gain? I mean, in a few years I'd lose my memories. Not just of magic, but of my home. My life. Everything I am and was and ever had. I'd lose it all. I'd be some strange girl who'd jsut popped up one day. Friends, but no family. No home. So... what do I gain that makes that loss worth it? What makes friendship worth that?"

Sayaka Miki has posed:
That information comes as new to her. Attesa hadn't heard of it while she watching over Bow on the other side. "By sold her soul to a demon, do you mean anything like a Soul Gem? Should we expect her to implode into something similar to a Witch if we are not careful?" Sayaka asks, eyes wide open by the concerning thought.

"It's just we have been warned about the existence of a massive Witch a while back that only leaves complete ruins wherever she goes", the Puella starts explaining. "If we have to worry about Beryl transforming into something similarly out of control, the entirety of Tokyo is in an even worse situation that it appears."

She isn't at all convinced that Hinoiri is as fine as she says she is, but she can't really force her to come out with it. "I understand you won't allow it to repeat, but if you find you want to let go of some stress that is still plaguing you from the experience, I want to help."

Though, there is yet another question, and Sayaka feels like this is really something that weighs on Hinoiri because magic is just another accomplishment to her, and losing all that she worked hard for, even if she won't be aware of it... It must be terrifying. Well, the thought of losing a part of yourself at all would be terrifying.

"What makes friendship, true friendship, worth it... Is that you would have people who care deeply around you, and who would want to stick by you through thick and thin. Friends make life all the more enjoyable because they are there for you to have fun with and for you to know where to go if you are troubled. Friends accept you as you are and don't want you to be anything other than yourself. No conditional care."

Hinoiri Kirara has posed:
Hinoiri Kirara shook her head. "No. It was some weird demon thing in the sun back then. I don't... exactly know what it is. But I could defeat it, if I was stronger. I'm more annoyed about how this means that arrogant heifer isn't even using her own power. It's something she gave up her soul for. Pathetic," Hinoiri muttered, the disdain clear in her voice.

Sayaka's comfort, however, makes her smile. And she, in a strange gesture for her... leaned against her. "I don't... think she'll turn into a witch. But I wouldn't say it's impossible. She's already halfway there in terms of personality. What... kind of massive witch? I don't remember that? The ones I've encountered are already pretty big, and like... is it bigger than them?" Welp, there was a new thing for her to worry about.

"So.... true friendship, huh. Is this why so many of you girls keep trying to protect me, even though I keep doing terrible things?" she asked, before shaking her head. "I... I've been having... some second thoughts, lately. I guess. I'm starting to wonder if what you've been saying is true. I thought when I got home, it'd all be worth it. I'd be right. I'd be.... I'd be worthy, and then everyone would see. But I haven't done that yet, and still the people here accept me and seem... to care. So.... a part of me, I guess... I'm not leaving Obsidian, or giving up on my goals or anything. I guess... I just... I'm... I'm going to start exploring other avenues, I guess."

"... I don't want to be someone like Beryl. The ends don't justify the means if they can destroy the world. Nothing does."

Sayaka Miki has posed:
A weird demon thing in the sun... That's concerning. Should they expect to have to deal with this demon as well even if they manage to stop Beryl? Complications abound, really. "Mahous of all kinds would be there to take part in the fight alongside you anyway, but I believe you", Sayaka smiles towards Hinoiri. "Who better to defeat a sun demon than the Sunbreaker?" How the fact that Hinoiri has called trading soul for power pathetic doesn't really escape her situation, but well, she clearly is only trying to disparage Beryl. It doesn't apply to anybody else.

Sayaka looks at the redhead leaning on her shoulder when Hinoiri asks about the massive Witch she has mentioned. "I don't really know much more than what I told you", Sayaka warns her. "This is all second hand information. She is apparently called Walpurgisnacht. Or people call her that, anyhow. I don't know if they were really able to read the runes that comprised her name. As far as I know only Madoka was able to at that time. We only fought two of her Familiars, an elephant and another that looked like the purple silhouette of a magical girl."

"I do consider you as a dear friend, Hinoiri", Sayaka confirms. "Even with everything that happened, you were only genuine in your attempts to stay by me. There was no ploy to exploit me for Obsidian or anything. And I care a lot about you, and I already accept you", she shows her cards completely. They will always be friends as far as Sayaka is concerned.

"Yes, you have been doing bad things, but I don't think you are a bad person, Hinoiri, certainly nowhere near somebody as rotten as Beryl", Sayaka remarks. A bad person wouldn't have taken my remarks about how the energy drain impacted the lives of people to heart. Yet, you did. " She nods to emphasize her point. "Whether you choose to stay in Obsidian or leave, I will always be your friend. But if you ever end up leaving it, it is also true that you are welcome here with no reserves."

Hinoiri Kirara has posed:
Hinoiri Kirara couldn't help but smirk, giving a small nod. "Yeah. Maybe when I ascend, I'll take a quick stop before heading off to home to utterly... to help you lot wreck Beryl. Just grind her face into the dirt, it's the least she deserves." Fortunately, Hinoiri saw what Sayaka did as entirely differently... unfortunately, she hadn't even considered that when she'd said that.

Hearing about Walpurgisnacht, however, made her frown. "An elephant and purple silhouette. And that was just two of the familiars? I'll... keep that in mind. It's likely not Beryl, though, if it already had familiars."

A small smile formed on Hinoiri's lips and she nodded. "Yeah. I just... I need the energy and I'll do more with it. But... I'm being more careful in how I gather it. To make sure nothing... too bad will happen to anyone. So you don't need to worry about that. I.... thank you, Sayaka. You've... you've really helped me, a lot. I'm really happy we're friends." She slowly got to her feet. "I should go, though. I just... needed to talk to you, I guess. I..."

She then stopped. Then glanced back at her. "Hey, Sayaka... How... important... do you think winning is? Like... Just because you CAN win doesn't mean you HAVE to win, right?"

Sayaka Miki has posed:
"They weren't normal Familiars, they packed quite the punch and defeating them was a struggle", Sayaka adds, really not liking the memory of that moment. Though part of the scare factor admittedly was due to the fact that ambush was the first time Sayaka had seen Madoka transform with Gretchen. She has come a long way since then though, and luckily, Gretchen isn't holding it against her. "I really hope the tale of that Witch being a danger to an entire city has been blown out of proportion", she confesses.

"I am really happy we are friends too", Sayaka stresses again, getting up from the sofa too when Hinoiri does. "If you ever feel like you want to talk to me again, don't worry about it. My door is always open to you."

However Hinoiri stops by the door before actually leaving. "How important winning is?" Sayaka blinks as she considers the question, understanding how pressing it must be for Hinoiri that she asked if she stopped at the last moment. That's really a curious coincidence considering their recent discussion, but all the more important as a result.

"That depends on the stakes. If it's keeping people safe, or, more mundanely, not failing at school, then I would say it's actually important. But being recognised as the best of the best is not worth it if it ruins a moment when you could have had fun instead. My advice then would be to take care of yourself and have fun", Sayaka smiles before Hinoiri goes away. "See you soon, Hinoiri, and good luck".