1983/A Clever Solution to Safe Dating

A Clever Solution to Safe Dating
Date of Scene:	03 October 2024
Location:	Mamoru's Apartment
Synopsis:	Usagi and Mamoru have a new strategy for dates: fight first, romance second. The monsteers can't interrupt their dates if they go hunting for them first, right? And as a reward? Pizza, no sewer hunt, and a few kitchen kisses.
Cast of Characters:	Mamoru Chiba, Usagi Tsukino

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Mamoru Chiba has posed:
There's an absurd amount of quick movement going on for a youma based vaguely on something as slow as probably a tortoise. "I can't see where it went! The damn thing moves like a centipede--" calls Tuxedo Mask from a burnt-out streetlight.

That probably didn't help.

"Oh! THERE!" he yells, throwing a rose that trails a red-lightning afterimage gleaming in its wake. The rose is aimed great! But the tortoise-shelled youma moves fast, and the shell is rounded, and the rose glances off it and embeds itself in the closest warehouse wall.

My friends, the youma does not move like a centipede. It moves like a goddamned ninja.

Usagi Tsukino has posed:
"This plan is working out great," Sailor Moon mutters to herself, scrambling up a streetlight - she'd fallen off after a way-too-fast attack by that turtle-tortoise-reptile youma, but managed to catch herself enough that she could inchworm crawl her way to safety. "Fight before we start up on the sweet stuff, nothing can go wrong -"

And to be fair, nothing has gone wrong. This is how they planned their date - patrol first, so that they wouldn't get attacked later. Datus interruptus surely wouldn't strike twice, after all.

But still!!

"Okay! I'm going after it! One escalation coming up!"

But all the silver beams in the world can't help when the youma can backflip.

"WHAT?!"

Mamoru Chiba has posed:
"If you don't stop we are going to eat every last one of the pizzas you stole from that poor delivery driver!" Tuxedo Mask threatens the youma, jumping down with his cane in hand and bolting after it. This time he tries throwing the cane to trip the youma up, but misses because at the last second he has to duck tortoise-shell shuriken, which embed themselves in the sidewalk.

"We have to do more training," huffs Mamoru irritably as the youma yells something unintelligible in an inexplicably American accent and scrambles up the wall.

The well-dressed teenager waits until the youma's on the roof before jumping up after it. "Aim the escalation at me and just track me!" he calls, running across the roof, silhouetted against the light-polluted evening sky.

Usagi Tsukino has posed:
"Don't think we won't! I can eat pizza all day and night!" Sailor Moon calls, backing up that threat with the undeniable force of her appetite. But all the threats in the world don't stop shuriken (SHURIKEN, REALLY?), and she falls back, listening to Mamoru.

"I'm with you. Taking it easy was great this summer, but not if Kappa-san over here can outrun us," and she does not look forward to training, because she's never liked physical activity, but this part of the date is taking way too long."

"Got it! You set us up and I'll take the shot!"

Tracking, she can do, and aiming on a dime. In fact, with that, she grabs the Crescent Wand again, and starts drawing the circle - leaving it unfinished, even as the glow builds and builds against the air - ready to fire.

Mamoru Chiba has posed:
Way too long.

Tuxedo Mask dives and grabs the tortoise man ninja youma around the legs and it falls with a cracking THONK, and they both start sliding off the roof, the youma yelling, "MY PIZZA! MY ENERGY! MY ENERGY PIZZA!"

"That's not how pizzas OR energy work!" Mamoru yells back, hooking his feet over the gutter and dangling precariously upside down, holding the struggling turtle-dude by the legs so Usagi can take the shot.

"I guess it's pizza for dinner~!" he calls to Sailor Moon.

Usagi Tsukino has posed:
Tuxedo Kamen snatches the tortoise man ninja youma and sends them cascading down the roof, and Sailor Moon closes the gap, in her circle, the golden light glowing, and silver beams cascade over Tuxedo Kamen and the youma.

"Moon Healing Escalation!"

For Mamoru, it's a burst of purifying energy, cool and comforting. For the youma? Probably a little bit deadly. Might have a bad case of the deads, now."That pizza - and that energy - are ours now, dude! This fight is over!"

She's got the inexplicable urge to add that it was 'totally tubular', which she is firmly jotting down as 'side-effect of youma'.

Mamoru Chiba has posed:
The youma yells again and this time it's less unintelligible: "C-cowabungaaaaa!" its voice peters out as it turns into dust and sparkles, its dark energy dispelled by the escalation.

Mamoru's left hanging upside down, his cape hanging down behind his head and arms, and he takes a second to readjust his balance lacking a tortoise dude youma-- then unhooks his feet and does a backflip down to the sidewalk.

It only looks so cool because the tortoise-shell shuriken poofed out of the sidewalk when the youma got dusted and he didn't shred his feet. (It looks really cool.)

"So much pizza," he says, glancing down the street to where the stack is. There are eight of them there. Eight pizzas.

"I should pay for it. And give the guy a really good tip. He was seriously going to open a manhole cover and deliver them under the street. We should get his number, maybe he delivers to rooftops too..."

Usagi Tsukino has posed:
The youma turns to dust and sparkles, its inexplicably American accent crying out the word, and Usagi finds herself raising a hand, thumbs up in its honor.

Then, Mamoru backflips down, and she claps excitedly, because it does look very cool. Everybody clap at her really cool boyfriend!!!

"That was a lot of pizza. And he really was going to go down there! In the sewers!" Where there's gunk. Truly, the bravest delivery guy of all time. "I mean, rooftops have to be safer than sewers, right?"

The pizza still smells really good. And as she glances down at the stack, she thinks she still sees some steam.

"Well, if you do, we definitely should eat it. Maybe not all of it." She can probably take down two of those boxes herself.

Mamoru Chiba has posed:
"Well-- let's take them to the apartment," says Mamoru, chest still a little puffed up from the applause, "and whatever we don't eat we can give away at school. Everyone likes leftover pizza, right? If nothing else, Neph can probably demolish a couple a day until they're gone."

He bounds down the street, taking out his wallet, and stuffs enough money for twelve pizzas in the groggily awakening delivery man's hand. "You'll be okay, keep the change," he says kindly, then picks up the stack of pizzas.

It's not that they're heavy. It's that they're unwieldy and hard to see over. "Think you can take half of 'em? Ooh, I smell grilled salmon." It's a good thing he put so much extra money...

Usagi Tsukino has posed:
"Yeah! Let's take them back with us, and we'll see what we have left to feed your horde of boys and my posse of girls."

She hops down from the street light, brushing her skirt off, then bounds over to Mamoru, and, on request, takes half the pizzas, holding them in both hands so she doesn't trip and take half of them out with her.

"'Course! This smells so good, I almost regret taking out that youma. It had such good taste in pizza orders!" She jiggles the boxes a little, sniffing at the contents.

"Let's go, before they get cold. I'll race you!"

Mamoru Chiba has posed:
It is absolutely a race that Sailor Moon wins, despite Tuxedo Mask's longer legs -- when the appetite leads, it cannot be bested.

In almost no time they're on the scene!! If by 'the scene' we mean 'have come through the roof entrance into the top floor of the building Mamoru bought'.

"Should we stay in henshin just in case, or count this as having made it to home base? Still no ghosts here, I checked again. No dark energy either," he says, putting his stack of pizzas on the empty kitchen's counter and turning on the light.

He goes around the corner and drags out a low table into the middle of the kitchen floor, then pulls -- one after the other -- two cushions out of his hat and plunks them on the floor to either side of the table.

Seating!

He starts opening pizza boxes to seeee. "This isn't a very romantic date so far," he says apologetically, "but at least it's fun, right? There's something really cool about unfinished places that aren't really ready for people yet."

Usagi Tsukino has posed:
It's a race that Sailor Moon wins without dropping a single pizza, even if they aren't entirely intact, by the time they make it to Mamoru's building - Usagi had snuck a slice of corn-and-miso pizza on the race, and her gloved hands are a little greasy, so she sneakily wipes them on her skirt.

"I think we're safe now," she says, before promptly knocking her toes on wood to be sure. "Let's drop henshin!"

And then she does, leaving herself in her regular clothes - a black miniskirt and pink turtleneck, alone with her boyfriend in his very big apartment, just them and pizza.

She drops down to the cushions after placing her stack of the pizzas on the table, and shakes her head.

"What do you mean? We fought a monster, just the two of us, and now we're all alone in your big apartment, just the two of us~ what's more romantic than that? Besides, it is really cool - this place might not be finished, but it's yours, and just for right now, it's just for the two of us."

Mamoru Chiba has posed:
Letting his henshin melt away when Usagi does -- he's in a nice button-down and his leather jacket, dress slacks, dress shoes which he takes off -- Mamoru turns to listen. Then he deposits himself on a cushion and fishes through the pizzas... he can maybe handle one pie. More likely he'll go through them and take a slice from each one.

For now, he's chosen the grilled salmon and jalapeno and avocado pizza, and he settles in.

"Every once in a while I apparently need the reminder that we think the same kind of things are romantic," he laughs, unfolding a leg just enough to nudge at Usagi's knee with his toes. "It is mine," he says with a smile, the one that's always been just for her, "and it is just for the two of us."

A beat. "And eight! Pizzas!" He takes an enormous bite.

Usagi Tsukino has posed:
Mamoru's apartment is huge and for now, fairly empty - it's still in the works, after all - but it's perfect the way it is, too, because it's the space that's for him, the space she and Kazuo and Mamoru are working on (when the real professionals aren't) to be exactly what he wants and needs.

And really, when you're a teenager, being alone with your boyfriend is the peak level of romance.

"I'm always happy to give that reminder," Usagi says with the perfect mix of cheer and sincerity. "Because we're perfect for each other, you know? I love spending time with you, and I love coming back here and seeing all the progress! It's really going to be a home!"

It's so perfect. She loves him so much.

"And eight pizzas! What was a youma even going to do with eight pizzas? In the sewers! With eight pizzas!"

Half of her second slice is already gone.

Mamoru Chiba has posed:
Mamoru's first slice is almost gone, but not quite, and he's distracted away from it again because of smiling at Usagi with such love for all that. "It is, and if you like it and we're still here then, maybe-- maybe after we get married, it can be our home," he says, a little haltingly at the end, even if there's no real uncertainty there. He's not afraid of offering pieces of future.

But. BUT. Eight pizzas. "Oh no, you don't think he had youma friends down there, do you? Maybe they were going to have a youma pizza party before going out and stealing more energy..." Mamoru says, more alarmed the longer he thinks about it. "Oh I don't want to investigate the sewers..."

Usagi Tsukino has posed:
Usagi nibbles the second bite to nothing but crust, and that's a good thing, because Mamoru starts to speak again, and she raises her eyes, looks at him, sees all the love in his expression, and goes utterly sappy in her overt happiness. She drops the crust.

"I'm going to love it," she says, easy and true, "Because I love you. Even if it was a box, it would be our box. And - and I would love for this to be our home."

And her eyes might be shiny and wet, but her voice is strong, because she too has no fear of offering her future. She loves him. She wants him. Whatever the future holds, it will meet them together or it won't meet them at all.

She's leaning in to kiss him when he raises that horrid possibility and she snaps back with such horror she nearly falls off her cushion.

"More of them?! More ninja kappa men?!" More of those backflipping cowabunga dudes?! "Make someone else do it! Make - make Zoisite and Nephrite do it, maybe, for the pizza, or something!"

They can't explore the sewers, they're supposed to be making out after this!

Mamoru Chiba has posed:
Mamoru hurriedly eats the last of his first slice, licks his fingers, and wipes them off on his pant-leg before getting out his phone and immediately sending off a group text. He could use his communicator but this is funnier.

    Mamoru TXT: hey everybody usa and i just stole 8 pizzas from a youma
    Mamoru TXT: we killed that one but it was trying to flee into the sewers
    Mamoru TXT: we only just thought now that maybe there are more youma
    Mamoru TXT: the manhole cover was at <coordinates>
    Mamoru TXT: we'll give you some of the pizza if you investigate pls investigate

Finally, Mamoru picks up a second slice of pizza as Usagi's phone has a field day buzzing with his texts. "We are definitely not exploring the sewers. Not even not tonight. I am not going down there," he says firmly, then jams fully a third of the slice in his mouth.

They are definitely making out after this.

Usagi Tsukino has posed:
There is pizza grease on their hands, and likely, on the table. It's on Usagi's cheeks too, which she'll make a face about soon, ready to dig around in her backpack for something to wipe at her face with. It's normal, like something regular kids do, and she likes it, as much as she liked the very abnormal start to this date.

When her phone starts lighting up with little ding ding ding dings as Mamoru sends out the alert, she laughs out loud.

"How many people do you think you just spooked, and how many of them do you think were betting on us finding something weird?" She doesn't have to check her phone to know that at the very least, Naru and Kazuo and Tamaki and Makoto and Ami and Saitou-chan were among the recipients. She can bet that Ami-chan, at least, would have been waiting for something to go wrong.

"Definitely not. It's gross and wet and smelly and like, underground. I'm good! We did our time," she will happily ignore that everyone else also did their time. "Besides, we already took out one of the youma! It's like, a learning opportunity, for everyone else to do it too. It's totally like, important to make chances for people to continue practicing their skills."

Mamoru Chiba has posed:
There is a lot of pizza grease, and a lot of pizza. There's so much pizza. Mamoru holds his hand in front of his face because of talking with his mouth full, and he sounds a little chagrined. "Oh rip I didn't snag napkins, did I. I can teleport back to the dorm and steal a roll of paper towels if worst comes to worst," he suggests, slightly muffled.

Then Usagi's laughing, and Mamoru's eyes crinkle up as his shoulders relax even further, and he finishes his second slice of pizza while she's coming up with a justification for making everyone else deal with the sewers.

"And besides, we're the royalty, right? But also the guys still have a lot of making up for bad behavior to do! And most importantly, we're cute and they might indulge us just because of that," he says, licking his fingers again. "But anyway they probably have a betting pool for our dates at this point."

Usagi Tsukino has posed:
There is so much more pizza than Usagi could ever hope to eat with just Mamoru's help. She's got maybe another box in her, now that she's on slice three. It's good pizza, and the topping choices are all excellent - she's trying the one Mamoru picked first now, grilled salmon and jalapeno and avocado and it's a mix of flavors that's lighting up her tastebuds with creamy-spicy-savory - but it's so much more than they can eat.

Their friends had better take them up on the amazing deal of eating pizza in exchange for investigating the sewers.

"I wasn't going to say it out loud," she laughs, "But I was also thinking they have like, a ton of naughtiness to make up for. And yeah! We are the cutest so like, why shouldn't we use that to our advantage everyone once in a while? No one could expect such a cute royal couple to dive in sewer water, right?"

Surely, they would not.

Of course, that's followed by an unladylike snort of laughter, at the mention of the betting pool, because, yeah, saying they were just betting is not taking it nearly far enough.

"It can't just be us who has this much chaos, right? We're a totally normal sample of what being a mahou does to a love life, yeah?"

Mamoru Chiba has posed:
"No, it can't be," Mamoru decides, already slowing down after two slices. He picks up a third but is contemplative about it. "We can ask Rashmi and Chrono? Or Amy, oh my god Amy is dating Hannah, she probably has more chaos than us, even if there are no youma for them to fight... but we're probably the most interrupted even if the level of chaos is average."

He can't help sounding a little dubious over the word 'average' though.

"We have to be a normal sample," he echoes, sounding even more like he's trying to convince himself. He takes a bite of his slice of Usagi's first pizza, thinking about the corn-and-miso taste and deciding it needs a little more kick, but will do for now.

He is firmly putting the sewers out of his mind. It's not their problem. At least not tonight.

Then, half a slice of pizza in hand, Mamoru says after a second with a glittering look behind his glasses-- which he takes off with his other hand and puts in his inside jacket pocket-- "You're so pretty I'm having trouble thinking about pizza." It's a confession with how frankly it's said, but it's also funny, and his wry little grin admits that too.

Usagi Tsukino has posed:
"I can't see Hannah-chan being happy without a fight during a date," Usagi says, honest. "Not like, you know, ultra-happy. So at the very least, Hannah-chan's dates have to have as many fights as ours."

Despite this, she is not following up on the idea of asking. Even though she's certainly, positively, absolutely sure that this is a common, shared problem among Mahou couples... some deep, inner instinct argues against the idea of confirming it. It's true, right? Why bring up a sore subject for her friends?

They're all experiencing this together.

"We're definitely totally Mahou normal. Mahormal."

And that's all there is to it. There's normal, there Mahormal, and there's pizza. And their friends will come by later, to get some pizza, and really, doesn't that mean they should get the making out part of the evening out of the way? It's only polite, right?

"I was just thinking that since someone else is going to come by for pizza when they're done, maybe we should be doing something else. Besides eating pizza. So we're not interrupted by not monsters, later."

There's a flush to her cheeks, because even if she's been kissing her boyfriend for a while... maybe a few months... several months, even... An Amount of Months, for sure... it's still something to blush about, getting to kiss and hold and admit to wanting it.

The fact that she's so pretty even great pizza can't distract from it helps, of course.

Mamoru Chiba has posed:
Pizza and no napkins. Mamoru is so torn. He wants to just kiss his prettily blushing pretty girlfriend right now, but there's pizza grease on their hands and faces, and they're both in nice clothes and grease stains are annoying to get out...

"I will be right back," he says, unfolding from the floor, "because we really need some napkins. Ten seconds or less, I know exactly where Koji's paper towels are--"

Really Mamoru.

There's a gold flash, not too too bright, and he disappears from the kitchen, sock feet and all.

It's six seconds by the time he finishes talking and vanishes, and he makes it back at the nine mark, triumphantly holding a roll of paper towels. Usagi gets handed a couple, and he takes a couple for himself, and it's not until his own hands and face are clean that he takes off his jacket and sidles over to sit down next to Usagi~

Usagi Tsukino has posed:
When Mamoru returns, three seconds after he started talking, Usagi is bent over at the waist, busting up with laughter. Not mocking - not meanspirited - just absolutely, utterly amused and besotted, and when he offers her the napkins she accepts them, still giggling scrubbing at hands and face.

She looks up at him, sucking in a breath that becomes a hiccupping follow up laugh, and it's not until his hands and face are clean and his jacket is off and he's sidled up close that she manages to stop laughing, turning to him with bright, bright eyes full of love and amusement, and she cups his cheek.

"You're ridiculous," she says fondly. "I love you."

And then she kisses him.

Mamoru Chiba has posed:
For a half-second, Mamoru's grinning against the kiss, unable to work up the willpower to even pretend to object -- he knows he's ridiculous -- but it's a kiss, and he returns it.

He returns it, his own hand coming up to trace a thumb across Usagi's cheekbone, then slide back until his fingers tangle a little with a twintail before resting gently at the nape of her neck.

Their kiss is spicy and sweet and savory as it deepens, but Mamoru doesn't push. He cheats, cheats with his empathy, with his psychometry, and even as their love is something they can drown in if they want to, and the golden warmth of home is in every touch, he looks for what Usagi wants to do, what Usagi's comfort level is, and he keeps to that.

Coming up for air, he leans his forehead against hers for a second and murmurs, "I love you so much. I'm so glad I can make you laugh."

Usagi Tsukino has posed:
What's even the point of denying it, when they are silly and ridiculous and terribly, incredibly, awfully in love? They make each other laugh, which is one of the most important things in love.

Usagi leans into Mamoru's touch, into the thumb that traces against her cheek, against the fingers that tangle a little with her hair, and cup the nape of her neck. The kiss deepens, but they don't go too far, not sharing a cushion on his kitchen floor, but then, they don't have to, not with his empathy working a feedback loop between them. His love, her love, warm and comforting, cool and soothing, stoking the fires of passion higher and offering an off-ramp all the while, a way to pull back if wanted.

It's not needed - Usagi is very, very comfortable with kissing Mamoru, with touching him, and when they break for air, she smiles at him, a little goofy, a little silly.

"You're going to make me laugh forever, you know? You and me and -" another little laugh - "And someday, not just on the kitchen floor!"