797/Electric Cockatoo

Electric Cockatoo
Date of Scene:	21 November 2023
Location:	Mitakihara Ward
Synopsis:	Hematite's bird youma's informed of the pecking order around here. Coco and Rashmi and a whole lot of heckling from various Shitennou and Kyouka and Naru and Himeko's bakeneko versus Mamoru's desire to find the Silver Crystal (and a giant bird).
Cast of Characters:	Mamoru Chiba, Nephrite, Zoisite, Jadeite, Pyrite, Kyouka Inai, Naru Osaka, Rashmi Terios, Coco Kiumi
Tinyplot:	Silver Crystal

---

Mamoru Chiba has posed:
Down the street from a pawn shop, there's a very. Large. Bird.

This one's not an emu, thank goodness, but that just means it's more multiples of its own normal size than the emu was. This cockatoo is roughly nine feet tall without raising his crest and rustling all his feathers! Its presumably clawed feet are stuffed in a pair of rubber galoshes. The wingspan is immense, and as the bird is currently indignant, those wings are spread in a display of aggravation as he rampages up and down the street bobbing his head. He's saying, in a voice like a rusty hinge, "Silver Crystal! Goodnight! Silver Crystal! Goodnight! Goodnight!"

As if this weren't enough, every time the bird's wings brush against something metal or a bystander, there's a kzaakt! of electricity and a bright little spark. If that's on a bystander, there's generally a yelp like they've gotten a medium static shock from a younger sibling rubbing their sneakers on the living room carpet. I mean, this is on top of the general yelling and scatter of people saying stuff like 'OVER HERE!' and 'OUT OF THE WAY!' and 'what does a BIRD want with the Silver Crystal!?'

There's no way, with all of THIS nonsense going on, that the caped and uniformed boy in the pawn shop down the street -- having a delightful conversation with the owner as he buys what's apparently the silver crystal -- can ever be clocked as the originator of this avian calamity!

Nephrite has posed:
    "So how does this work, exactly?" Nephrite asks as he stands with his arms folded, observing the genius plan that is underway out the pawn shop window. "I've never been to one of these." 'These' meaning 'one of Hematite's plans' or 'A pawn shop' or 'some kind of bird or something?' will remain a mystery disputed by scholars for ages to come.

Zoisite has posed:
    "Oh, they're simple splendid! Truly splendid! I can't remember anything about the last time, but I'm at least thirty percent sure it was splendid!" Zoisite gushes over the last time Hematite decided to do something with a bird. He thinks. It was all very vague. "Basically, we just stand on the sidelines and heckle unless someone makes themself a problem for us. If that happens, we deal with them appropriately."

Jadeite has posed:
    Jadeite reads a book in one hand and drinks hot apple cider out of a mug that reads, '#1 Dad' that he stole off someone's desk on the way here. He barely glances up to say, "All four of us are here. We are only missing you-know-who. These magical girls would have to be extremely stupid to try to take on all of the Shitennou at once." He starts to gesture with the mug, but thinks better of it. No need to waste any beverage sloshing it around. Instead he just raises it back to his lips and says, "So, of course, we are almost guaranteed to have at least one of them do so."

Pyrite has posed:
    A calico cat is very purposefully walking down the street. She misses Hematite, and has come to find him. The bakeneko will not be denied. Tail up, ears pivoting to take in all the sounds around her, she zeroes in on one particular voice. With a 'mrrp', she begins navigating towards the person who fed her so much fish and showed her so much love and attention when she was first picked up off the street!
    And then.
    It happens.
    The bakeneko stops where she is, and jolts into a low-to-the-ground position, feet spaced wide apart. With eyes wild, the bakeneko turns her head this way and that, looking at the glorious sight before her.
    A. Giant. Bird.
    Best. Day. Ever.
    The calico cat starts chirping and chuffing as she loses all interest in Hematite and starts stalking the cockatoo, while growing gradually larger herself.

Kyouka Inai has posed:
    A flare of dark energy the size of a 9 foot cockatoo is pretty hard to miss for someone like Kyouka if she's anywhere in the vicinity, and it just so happened that she was, by pure coincidence. Nobody even had to call her this time, she was just like around. Not at the pawn shop, actually, but the mechanic where she gets her bike serviced is nearby and she was there waiting on an oil change.

    With a hiss of displaced air she appears on a rooftop nearby/above the bird, a few buildings down from the pawn shop which contains half the Dark Kingdom. Crossing her arms over her chest, she observes the bird, quirking her lips to the side in a contemplative expression.

    "You know, back in my day," She says to no one, or possibly the bird, "People had respect for the craft. This is not respect." She sighs, sitting down on the edge of the building with her legs dangling, and pulls out her phone, tapping away on the screen.

Naru Osaka has posed:
It's a Tuesday. Which generally means something bizarre is likely to happen.

Oh wait, that's pretty much any day of the week.

Naru has coffee, because of course she does, and she is still looking just a little rough around the edges from a couple days ago. Clearly, that's why she has a coffee.

Naru steps out of the coffee shop, having heard all the screaming and the commotion and hullabaloo and just stands there a moment, looking up at nine feet worth of cockatoo. Y'know. She's just going to take another drink of coffee for the moment. Because nine feet of cockatoo.

Must be Tuesday.

Rashmi Terios has posed:
"...What?" Rashmi asks no one in particular, having rounded the corner to be confronted with Megatiel just... Yelling about crystals.

She ducks into an alley, and one henshin later she flits out and toward the bird. "But *why* though?" she asks herself, encouraging bystanders to do a little less standing and a little more backing away from the zappy bird.

Looking over her shoulder as she helps an elderly man out of the way, she calls out the question that has suddenly become the most important question ever. "Excuse me! Mister Bird-san? Why even are you?"

Coco Kiumi has posed:
When one goes shopping, it is expected some levels of noise from many things happening all around. It is generally not expected said noise would be in the form of a very big avian shouting about the silver crystal with the precision of a clock. A very broken clock. Seriously, it's not even night!

Why the heck it wants the Silver Crystal and why is it saying goodnight to everyone? "That's the last way anyone would be able to sleep, you big bird" says a slightly irritated Yellow Pearl Voice.

"Riding on the Winds of the Aurora: Pichi Pichi Voice, Live Start!" the mermaid princess starts singing the purifying song from a seven seas. There, that's a pretty good oneiric image for a bird now? Please, go sleep.

Mamoru Chiba has posed:
"Generally speaking," Hematite tells his Shitennou, all crammed into the pawn shop with him as he holds up the fake silver crystal he just bought, then slight-of-hands it away, "these are a distraction, and you let it run its course. And also heckle the fighters. And sometimes me. But I'd appreciate it if you mostly stick to the fighters, you know how I get and I don't want to get like that today."

'How I get' meaning basically kind of flustered, which is a bad look in front of magical girls, to be perfectly fair.

Outside, the Electric Cockatoo yells "Silver Crystal! Get it birdo! Get it birdo! Goodnight!" at Rashmi, then SHRIEKS when it sees the bakeneko. All its feathers poof out, making it seem to be 30% more bird by volume, and it stalks closer, feathers zapping like a van de graaf generator. Dzzzzt DZZZT.

There is a GIANT CAT. Down the street. Getting ready to pounce this floofed monstrosity. And the purifying song starts, and Hematite steps outside while putting in a pair of earplugs. He feels his phone buzz, and as he steps away from the door to one side, to let the other Shitennou out of the shop, he reads it and bites off a glove to text back.

    <PHONE> A text from Kyouka Inai: why is it always birds
    <PHONE> You text Kyouka Inai: bc it's funny
    <PHONE> A text from Kyouka Inai: i think a bird offended you once
    <PHONE> You text Kyouka Inai: im busy XD

"Pyrite, can your cat not eat my youma?" he asks distractedly, squinting at Rashmi and Coco, then spotting Naru down the street and sighing slightly. "Nephrite, can you make sure Naru doesn't get birded? Even if the Device user throws up a barrier, she's in the know enough that she doesn't get kicked out of them."

Meanwhile, in response to Coco's song, the Electric Cockatoo itself twitches a little, swaying on one foot for a second, then SCREECH-SINGING along with Coco. It's a pretty song! The giant bird likes it! And it doesn't know the tune at all. Or the words at all. But it's also slightly smaller.

Nephrite has posed:
    Nephrite sounds very dubious about Zoisite's claims, but decides to take the word of a veteran, so to speak. He ducks his head a bit, because he thought he just sensed a teleport, and most of their enemies can't do that (or at least not willy-nilly), and also he is very tall and can't see rooftops very well from inside a pawnshop. "...Is that Stellar? I wonder if she is going to become involved. What does she do again?"

    When Coco starts singing, he sighs and retrieves the Obsidian-brand Authentic Gourmet Exclusive Ear Plugs he was provided with and inserts them. No purifying him today, thank you very much.

    At Hematite's request, Nephrite sighs and steps outside. "Of course she's here too. Of course." He's definitely not letting Naru get birded. In a blur of motion, Nephrite leaps into the air, and comes down next to Naru. "May I escort the lady away from the electrical hazard?" he asks in a very cavalier fashion given the potential threat, before scooping up Naru in his arms (careful not to spill her drink), and steadily backing away so as not to agitate the youma.

    Of course, he'll put her down if she doesn't fancy being carried, but probably not until she is out of range of lightning strikes.

Zoisite has posed:
    "God, does she even do anything?" Zoisite says with his eyes rolling. "Maybe she has some nachos or something though. I could really go for some nachos right now. Do you think I should go try to bum some nachos off of her? I'm going to go bum some nachos off of Stellar, hold on." He then teleports up onto the roof with Kyouka once he gets line of sight on her. "Could you spare a few nachos for a fellow American down on his luck?" Zoisite asks politely from behind Stellar, with his best American accent. In English. Because he couldn't find a copy of The Treasure of Sierra Madre in Japanese. Those bastards at the movie rental store had better watch their backs tonight after work.

    He also looks pained as he is subjected to Yellow Pearl Voice's singing. Not her voice, her voice is fine probably, but it's doing a number on his Dark Energy-saturated body getting pelted with purification juice or whatever. He is pretty tough, so he's only bleeding out of his ears a little bit. It's fine, it happens sometimes, he'll regenerate the damage. For now, he just tosses up an invisible barrier around himself and fumbles with the ear plugs in his pocket briefly before sticking them into his ear holes.

Naru Osaka has posed:
"This is fine." Naru decides as she continues to take just a few moments to drink coffee in the doorway to the coffee shop as all hell breaks loose.

It's really not fine.

Naru looks up at Nephrite when he appears beside her and she smiles. "Good morning, I didn't expect to see you here." Because it's a perfectly reasonable moment to have a perfectly normal conversation, right?

And then she's carried out of range and she laughs softly, not offended, clearly just amused. "You know, I can just walk, but I do appreciate the company."

Kyouka Inai has posed:
    Stellar is still on her perch on the rooftop, legs dangling, phone in her hand. She shoots off a couple of text messages to a couple of different people, then puts the phone away. She is then distracted by the appearance of a giant cat, coming to stalk the giant bird. A mild sigh. This would have all been so easy if she could still fight things herself. Hey, at least there's Rashmi over there and the singing girl and.. oh, it's Naru by the coffee shop.

    She's about to go check on her when Zoisite appears directly behind her and requests Nachos. Standing up where she was sitting, she turns to face him, quirking an eyebrow. "No nachos here, compadre, but if you happen to find any do share. I'm feeling a bit.. peckish." A glance at the bird. Then..

    Stellar vanishes from the rooftop, and re-appears directly beside Naru, possibly scaring the crap out of her but hopefully not making her drop her coffee. "You know, Naru-chan, I'm not sure if you have terrible luck or your actual supernatural power is to subconsciously put yourself in danger. Good morning, by the way. Watch out for the bird." She ducks casually under a cascade of sparks that come a little too close when the bird flaps its wings.

    Just then Nephrite appears out of nowhere and scoops Naru up in his arms. She blinks, then says, "Oh, hey Nephrite. You know, it's polite to ask before manhandling a lady." She doesn't intervene unless Naru protests, though. "I don't suppose you're going to y'know, do anything about the bird."

Coco Kiumi has posed:
The bird now is cheering at itself to go get the crystal, and is still insisting on the goodnight thing. Joining the fray of the giant animals is a cat too. Is there a zoo of growing animals somewhere nearby? Please, take better care of them.

The bird is at least liking the song. Very cultured of it? Maybe there is space for a three-way collaboration before sea, land and air. She would need a better singer, but you take what you can get. So she starts singing along the giant bird, and you know what? Giving it its Live Stage. Because yes.

Of course, that one is enchanted, designed to try and keep the bird within its confines while it's getting purified, with a bidirectional pushback effect along the borders of the white sphere. It's ok now, try not to electrocute anyone, and sing out whatever you have on the shining stage.

Jadeite has posed:
    Jadeite pays Nephrite and Zoisite no attention. He just looks up from his book towards Hematite. "How many does this make now?" he asks as the Silver Crystal is put away. If any of them were real, Hematite would have told the rest of them immediately, because there is no reason at all to hide that kind of information from his closest subordinates, so of all the Silver Crystals collected so far, none of them must be the genuine article. Probably. Though how would they even know? Is there a test they can perform in the field? Is it like the Maltese Falcon and you have to try to carve away the exterior to make sure it's not a replica? Does anyone but Zoisite and Jadeite even watch Humphrey Bogart movies?

    The Kiseru Lady does, but she's not here, and Jadeite has never met her, so he's just going to assert 'No one who matters' as the hypothetical answer to that hypothetical question from a hypothetical onlooker.

    He tilts his head away from the purification waves as he carefully marks his place in his book, sets it aside, and one-handedly activates his ear protection. "Thanks for these." He also tucks his book under his arm, wanders outside after everyone else, looks around at the chaos, sees the giant cat, and pauses. He turns slowly to look at Hematite semi-accusingly, and raises a single eyebrow as if to ask, 'One of yours?'

    The mention of Pyrite explains everything though, by dint of not explaining anything except 'ghost nonsense'. Fine, whatever. He siiiips at his apple cider some more.

Rashmi Terios has posed:
Amusingly, it's *because* of the presence of the cat that decides Rashmi's next course of action. This is a shopping street, after all, who knows how many kids are going to be here? They definitely do not deserve to see a nature documentary played out in the middle of the street.

    << *BONG!* >> << TIME-SPACE BARRIER >>

The barrier expands rapidly to mark out a dome a couple of blocks wide, shunting away the passersby and taking the fight half a dimension to the left.

Now the only people who have to deal with the bird, are the ones who made the choice to. Be it on their own heads.

    << *BONG!* >> << RING BIND >>

A wide loop of golden light wraps around the screeching bird, and a second around the bakeneko, anchoring them in space for the moment and letting them really *marinate* in the Live Melody. Rashmi pushes off the ground to get some altitude, and cups her hands around her mouth. "IS ANYONE MISSING THEIR PETS? BECAUSE THIS IS KIND OF DISTRACTING AND I JUST WANTED SOME COCOA."

Pyrite has posed:
    Pyrite does not respond or appear. Himeko does text Hematite though!
    <PHONE> You text Hematite: Why would the bakeneko be eating your youma.
    <PHONE> You text Hematite: Is the youma delicious?
    <PHONE> You text Hematite: If so, that is kind of on you, Onee-chan.
    <PHONE> A text from Hematite: it's not on me!! i didn't know the bakeneko would show up, jeez
    <PHONE> You text Hematite: No one expects the feline inquisition.
    The bakeneko is growing larger and larger. From 'roughly horse-sized' to 'wow that is a really big cat', she can now flip over an SUV with one paw without much effort. She pauses (or pawses, hah) when the cockatoo spots her, tail flicking back and forth, but Coco's singing seems to be subduing it? As a youkai, the bakeneko is not necessarily corrupted or anything, so she just cautiously resumes her approach.
    Until she is suddenly entangled through devilry! She starts trying to shake her feet to get rid of an unseen spatial anomaly the way a cat does when someone tries to put socks on a cat that the cat does not desire. 'Fft. Ffft.' and then a (deepened due to scale) annoyed, 'Meooow!' is voiced to make it clear she Does Not Want This.

Mamoru Chiba has posed:
"She does shielding," Hematite tells Jadeite loudly, since the other two left already and he can't actually hear how loud he is. "Stellar, I mean. Defense." And then he looks defensive at Jadeite's eyebrow lifting. "That's Pyrite's new cat! She's a bakeneko--"

After reading his screen, Hematite makes a stinkface and sleight-of-hands his phone out of nowhere. "I want to figure out who placed all these fakes, because they did a good job," he tells Jadeite, again loudly. "They're all a little big magic. Just enough to catch the attention. Here, do you want the Phantom Silver Crystal or the Phantom Silver Crystal?"

He offers one of Hinoiri's fakes -- that he just bought -- in one hand, and one of Chiyo's pineapple-flavored Silver Crystal lollipops in the other.

Meanwhile, the bird now has a stage!! And it's still distracted by the singing, and it's also still distracted by the cat, but there's a glowing bubble around it getting rid of some of its general anger--

--and then there's also a golden ring around it, and Hematite's looking impressed at Coco and Rashmi both--

--and then oh no, Rashmi got the bakeneko too. "RASHMI! Let go of the cat please! PYRITE! Come get your cat right now!!!"

The cockatoo is now smaller enough that the ring around it literally falls off, and it shrieks in triumph and starts goading the bakeneko from its bubble high in the air. "Baka neko! Baka neko! BAKA NEKO!"
The bird's rubber boots fall off too, and now it's about five feet tall and has talons again. Better not let it out.

Nephrite has posed:
    Nephrite looks down at Naru skeptically. "You realize that is a predatory animal, yes? Charged up with Dark Energy, who knows what it might do. That beak is not just for appearances, and if those... Rubber... Boots... Were to come off..." He can't believe he just said that. "They might merely be for gripping a human's finger at normal size. At this size, they can slice a human apart. You can walk when you are out of range of both that and the electricity." Not that he honestly believes Hematite would set a lethal bird youma on the civilians, because he's soft like that, but accidents happen, and they aren't going to happen to Naru on Nephrite's watch.

    He pauses when Stellar appears, blinks at her, and then carefully sets Naru down on the street corner across from the cockatoo. "For what it is worth, I did ask first. I just did not wait for an answer, because of..." He gestures at the youma. He also scoffs lightly at the magical girl. "It's not mine," he protests defensively, as though the very implication he would turn a cockatoo into a youma is insulting. Also, why would he do anything about the bird? He wants to protect Naru, not randoms. That simply does not compute, ma'am. "Are you going to 'do anything about the bird'?" is his deflecting retort.

Zoisite has posed:
    Zoisite remains determined when Stellar disappears. He teleports over to her again. "Would you like some nachos though?" he says loudly, for the same reasons as Hematite. "I know a guy who can hook us up. Hang on, let me go see if he's available." He teleports over to Jadeite. "You're not doing anything, right?" Then he turns to yell down the street to Kyouka, "HE'S NOT DOING ANYTHING! WHAT DO YOU LIKE ON YOUR NACHOS!"

Kyouka Inai has posed:
    "Oh please," Stellar replies to Nephrite, glancing over at the bird and the.. substantially larger cat. Which, for the record, she can tell is not made from Dark Energy, although that only slightly decreases the concerning nature of an enormous cat. Still, it looks like Rashmi and Yellow Pearl Voice between them are doing a fairly admirable job at restraint. "It's a five-foot cockatoo with fresh-laundry static, you're really overstating the situation. I'm sure Naru-chan could walk herself out of-"

    She cuts off when he retorts as to whether or not she is going to do anything about it. "I'm not allowed to do anything about it. No offensive magic, remember? I'm just here to make sure nobody gets killed although," A glance at the cat, "It seems like the bird is the one in the most danger at the moment. I wasn't implying you made it, just y'know, if you're concerned about poor innocent Naru here maybe you should get rid of it. The bird, I mean."

    She then addresses the now-put-down Naru. "Sorry, not to diminish you, Naru-chan. I'm perfectly aware you can take care of yourself. I just assume you haven't gained the ability to blast people-sized birds into particles since the last time we spoke."

    Zoisite then follows her, and when he asks if she would like nachos, she turns to him again, mildly irritated. "Dude, there's no time I wouldn't like nachos, but there's actually not a great place to get them around here. The best mexican restaurant thats even close to authentic is over in Mitakihara and I'm not paying the Doordash premium for-"

    Then Zoisite goes to harass Jadeite about it, and she yells back, "Tell him to get extra guac, it's really good there!"

    She spies Hematite down the street when he yells to Rashmi. She gives him a shrug, as if to say, 'hey man, they're your employees'.

Jadeite has posed:
    "Oh. Like that... One person. The book girl, was it? I blasted her at a warehouse and she had a shield. I think that was the only thing she could do, but I can't be sure, it was all sort of a lot to deal with at the time." He eyeballs the two Phantom Silver Crystals. "Do I need to take one?" he asks suspiciously. He has no idea where either of them have been. Reluctantly, he snaps his fingers and one of his own youma fades into existence. An attractive (in a fanged, feathery kind of way) female youma kneels and asks, "Lord Jadeite, what can--AGH! MY ANTENNAE!" She claps her hands over her ears and curls her moth-like antennae backwards in a useless attempt to keep purification vibrations out of them.

    Jadeite scowls and extends a forceshield around both himself and the youma. "Lunara, can you plesae try to be professional about this? Here, take one of these Phantom Silver Crystals, and take it somewhere secure back in the Kingdom."

    Desperately, the mothy-birdy-demony youma lady takes the one that actually looks like a crystal, with hurried bows and apologies to Hematite, before disappearing to somewhere less damaging to her soul.

Naru Osaka has posed:
"Morning, Stellar." Naru greets Kyouka as she appears, just before she got scooped up. "Based on this week, I'm voting with the second one." Fortunately Nephrite is removing her from the splash zone on the bird.

"Neph.. I'm still vaguely hungover from having gotten shot again earlier this week, the absurdness of a giant bird and a giant cat fighting it out in front of where I got coffee.. Yeah, I got nothing on this one except watching the chaos and drinking coffee." She does jsut that, drinking more coffee.

Naru waves a little at Stellar with a little laugh. "Nope, no blasting that I've discovered."

Coco Kiumi has posed:
"My bet is on a zoo", Coco tells Rashmi in a brief pause for the song when she spots the redhead. "You know, a magical one for those in the know, made to show off the spectacular characteristics of the magical species they have?" Pause. "They do need to be more careful though with their runaway animals if that's the case."

The bakeneko seems to be really trying to get at the bird. Is it hungry? A hungry bakeneko, where has she heard that one? Oh, she remembers now! She was talking about this with Hematite at the masquerade. Maybe she can sneak in some texts while she sings.

Rashmi Terios has posed:
Well *this* is turning into complete chaos, now that the only thing keeping the bird in place is the Live Stage. Whipping around to orient on the familiar voice, Rashmi's eyes widen. "Wait so-- This is you?! I-- wh-- but why--"

Which point her chocolate-deprived brain simply gives up, and the redhead lets out a long, teenage sigh, and the Bind around the bakeneko shatters into flakes of golden light. "Please don't make me regret that! And WHERE DID YOU EVEN FIND BOOTS THAT SIZE." she calls back down, throwing up a shield to block stray sparks as she circles the Stage, trying to figure out how to handle this with a minimum of bird panic.

Bird panic helps *nobody.*

"If there was something like that and I hadn't heard of it," she says to Yellow Pearl Voice, "I would be *so angry.* But look, it's shrinking, it's probably not really a magical bird. And it looks like if we can keep it up, it'll take care of itself..."

Pyrite has posed:
    Hematite's continued insistence that Pyrite come get her cat results in a text message.
    <PHONE> You text Hematite: I am on my way. I need to get my bicycling equipment on. It is important to be mindful of safety while on the road.
    It'll probably be a bit longer before she arrives.
    For her part, the bakeneko is throwing a fit right up until the golden space ring gets removed. Then, casting an offended look towards Rashmi, the youkai starts looking around for the bird again. Target spotted! And the target is insulting her! Unacceptable!
    She sits up on her hind legs, and--WOW that is a big cat. She's easily taller than all of the one-story buildings nearby, and could probabyl reach the roof of a two-story building with her paws in order to peek over the top if she needed to. Instead, she bunches up her haunches, and then leaps gracefully into the air, trying to swat the cockatoo out of the air! ...And getting shocked probably! ...Which will make her freak out in mid-air and twist to land heavily across two cars and a cabbage stand, crushing all of them with her mighty feline mass!
    Bakeneko is displeased.
    Also, hopefully the owners have insurance.

Mamoru Chiba has posed:
"Yeah I'm absolutely delighted that two primarily defensive fighters are managing to take out a youma, it's really cool to watch," Hematite tells Jadeite cheerfully, and then Zoisite shows up yelling about nachos, and he says with a sad face, "You're asking Jadeite to leave the party? Mean. Send a youma for takeaway, come on."

Hematite's phone is buzzing again, and he already looks annoyed, and then he looks absolutely flabbergasted when he takes it out -- because a third person is now texting him!

    <PHONE> A text from Yellow Pearl Voice: I think your sister's bakeneko is out. It's growing bigger and trying to eat a youma.
    <PHONE> You text Yellow Pearl Voice: it is definitely out, i am trying to get it away
    <PHONE> A text from Yellow Pearl Voice: Oh, I am not seeing you. Where are you? At least it seems to be calmed by my song. And another of us is binding it in place.

<PHONE> You text Yellow Pearl Voice: i'm down the street yelling
    <PHONE> You text Yellow Pearl Voice: dont worry the bird is a plushie you cant hurt it
    <PHONE> You text Yellow Pearl Voice: the bakeneko is real
    <PHONE> You text Yellow Pearl Voice: how do you text and sing at the same time
    <PHONE> A text from Yellow Pearl Voice: Lots of yelling going on, it's starting to hurt my ears. Can you believe that bird wants the Silver Crystal too?
    <PHONE> A text from Yellow Pearl Voice: Mic in one hand, phone in the other, of course.

Then from another quarter:

    <PHONE> A text from Himeko Soryuu: I am on my way. I need to get my bicycling equipment on. It is important to be mindful of safety while on the road.

Hematite pockets his phone emphatically, resolving not to take it out again for the rest of the fight. The bird is now shorter than Naru, and there are still giant rubber boots in the live stage with it. It can't even zap anything since nothing about its situation is grounded. Instead, it continues to strut and 'sing' along with Yellow Pearl Voice and bob its head in time with the music, occasionally yelling out 'BAKA NEKO! SILVER CRYSTAL! GET IT BIRDO! BAKA NEKO! GOODNIGHT!' and variations on same. Oh then the bakeneko gives it a marvelous opportunity and SHOCKS the giant cat. ZORT!

It is now three feet tall and starting to move erratically.

"YEAH IT'S MINE! IT'S A PLUSHIE, YOU CAN SQUISH IT WITHOUT HURTING A REAL BIRD," Hematite finally yells to Rashmi, even louder than everything else he's been saying. "IN FACT PLEASE DO." The cat will not stop freaking out until it has no target anymore, clearly.

Himeko is obviously getting revenge for something. Probably for Hematite still being full of dark energy.

Coco Kiumi has posed:
Well, the cat is growing bigger and probably can go back to normal too, so Coco isn't sure the bird's size has anything to do with it being a magical species or not. That's before one of the replies by Hematite, at least.

"Apparently it's actually an enchanted plushie", the mermaid informs the other magical girl. Who knows that's before or after Hematite does the same. "Lots of plushie magic going about recently. I wonder what's the deal with it."

Anyway, Coco decides to switch things up, and after Riding on the Winds of the Aurora, she starts singing Ever Blue. Not like it changes anything as far as its purification is concerned. She just enjoys this one more, now she isn't trying to accomodate avian demands.

Avian demands that are somehow as loud as ever despite its reduced size. It is still going on about the goodnight deal too. Maybe she should clock it while she still can.

Nephrite has posed:
    Nephrite sighs. "Here." He places a hand firmly but gently on Naru's shoulder, and infuses her with a more-than-adequate amount of energy. Not quite life energy, but some kind of potent magical energy that takes its place. "I have some extra." he mutters. Thanks to a book he obtained recently with some very interesting properties.

    Then he just shrugs at Stellar. "When it starts threatening something I care about, I'll consider stepping in. You could be protecting--" *CRUNCH* *CAR ALARMS GOING OFF* *SOMEONE YELLING, 'NOT MY CABBAGES!!' IN THE DISTANCE* "--those over there." He gestures at the line of smushed cars and also one cabbage stand and raises his eyebrows encouragingly, as if to say, 'well?' "Hm? You're allowed to protect things still, right?"

Rashmi Terios has posed:
'Primarily defensive,' he says.

Well, Hematite isn't really wrong, but upon learning that the bird isn't even a bird, and isn't going to be traumatized by anything they do to it, Rashmi decides to bring out one of her more decisive options, since the bird is trapped and needs to go anyway.

A half-dozen orbs of light resolve around her as she backs up a bit. "Nicomachea, please calculate vectors to avoid hitting Yellow's Live Stage *at all,* thanks?"

    << *BONG!* >> << COMMAND INPUT CONFIRMED. VECTOR ADJUST. >>

    << SOLAR BARRAGE >>

As quickly as one Barret is fired, another is summoned, setting up a steady stream of direct-fire, golden bullets.

Apparently Rashmi has a suppressive-fire option in her toolkit as well!

"I heard," Rashmi chuckles at Yellow's comment. "That makes this easier at least and was someone yelling about nachos? ...Now I'm hungry."

Jadeite has posed:
    Jadeite turns towards Zoisite, when Zoisite appears. His scowl deepens. "I am not teleporting to another continent to get you authentic nachos. Get them yourself!" he snaps. He's not going to send one of his youma on food retrieval. He has dignity, unlike SOME people. "I'M NOT GETTING YOU EXTRA ANYTHING!" he yells back at Stellar. God, he's going to keep being pestered by Zoisite until he actually goes and gets nachos, isn't he? Jadeite resolves to do nothing for as long as possible, raising his purloined mug and slurping loudly from it.

Zoisite has posed:
    Zoisite says, "You're the only one here who can literally teleport anywhere in the world without any issue. You're Mister Teleporter. That's literally the only thing you are good at. Now, go get the nachos, I'll pay for them, and we can all share them when we're done here, hm?" he says with a sarcastic little smile as he tilts his head to the side in annoyance. Then he turns and cups his hands around his mouth to yell back to Stellar. "HE WANTS TO KNOW IF YOU WANT ANY OTHER EXTRAS!"

    No way is he sending a youma to take care of this. Just think of the delivery fees!

Naru Osaka has posed:
"Whoa.." Naru blinks as Nephrite provides energy that is way more effective than coffee. "Thank you." She pauses a moment and then tips her head up to look at him. "Wait.. how are you tossing around stuff that isn't dark energy? Cause that didn't feel like dark." Because of course she appreciates the finer points of being shoved to the gills with dark energy.

She pauses and then sighs a little. "We're all going to have to go out for nachos after this." Thanks Zoi. Now everyone's hungry.

Kyouka Inai has posed:
    Stellar smiles at Naru. "Oh, well, sorry about the no blasting but don't worry, I think things here are mostly under control." That's a funny thing to say, with a giant cat crushing cars in the background as she says it.

    She turns her attention to Nephrite, and scowls. "Look, my job is to protect and nurture magical warriors, not cars or cabbage stands." she informs him testily. "If the thing starts actually menacing one of my kids, then I'll step in but it seems pretty much like they have it under control." As Rashmi is shooting off barrages of magical bullets behind her.

    She then yells over towards Jadeite, "I just said there's a pretty good place over in Mitakihara, I think the chef's from Mexico! His name is Juan, he's a cool dude!"

    To Zoisite she adds, "See if they have a sombrero, it'd look funny on the bird!"

Pyrite has posed:
    The bakeneko gets up, broken glass and bits of twisted metal scattered across her fur, and also cabbage leaves in her tail, sits and starts cleaning said tail totally cooly. She meant to do all that, which is why she is now taking the time to de-cabbage herself. She even takes her eyes off the increasingly decreasing bird. That's how confident she is that she has everything under control. Eventually, she looks up, and finds the bird is much, much smaller, and also not as delectable looking as before.
    With a triumphant head turn and a fluff of her tail, the bakenko walks away from the disaster area. She wasn't really that hungry to begin with. It's fine. She also steadily shrinks down so that by the time she reaches Hematite, she is roughly cat-sized again. She flops on her side on the pavement immediately, exposing her fluffy belly for pets, as she cleans a paw, confident she took care of everything.
    A moment later, the sound of a ringing bike bell can be heard, coming closer and closer. Eventually, Himeko drives up, helmet and safety pads on, careful to signal with her arm out when she turns onto the street. Her pink bike's basket is full with brown paper bags, and she has some strings or something underneath her chin, and a strange shape held in place against the back of her head and neck.
    "I am here, Onee-cha--I mean... Hematite-senpai!" Whew! Good thing she caught herself! Otherwise she might have put her brother's identity in danger! "I apologize for the delay. I stopped to get some lunch. I know you all are usually hungry after a caper or shenanigan." She appears very proud of herself for knowing those words and using them in what she is almost completely sure is the correct manner.
    Then she starts distributing food from that Mexican place that is pretty good, and puts the sombrero back on her head after it fell backwards during her ride.
    "What did you need me to do again?" she asks, as she extracs an empanada from a bag and starts munching on it.
    She apepars unfazed by the chaos and destruction.

Nephrite has posed:
    "I was a mage long before I learned how to use Dark Energy," he assures Naru. It's not like all of his star magic runs off of the stuff after all. Then he sighs upon seeing Himeko roll up. "I'm not even going to question it. At least she brought lunch." Then he shrugs towards Stellar. "Care to join us for a post-Shenanigan lunch?"

    He glances at Book Girl and Yellow Pearl Voice too. "We are having lunch! Would you like to join us?" he calls out with a raised voice. This is a thing one does with the heroes who just foiled one's co-worker's evil scheme.

Zoisite has posed:
    Sneering, Zoisite turns back to Jadeite. "Stop being a wet blanket, you'll grow mold! Look, everyone is hungry, and I want the real thing, so--" Then Himeko is rolling up and the bakeneko is flopping on the sidewalk, and those car alarms are really annoying, and Nephrite is inviting everyone to join them. "God. GOD." That's all he can really say about the situation. He'll have to convince Pyrite to part with her sombrero for Stellar. It might be a bit big for the bird, now that it has shrunk down, but maybe that will just make it even funnier.

Mamoru Chiba has posed:
"Well I'M not getting nachos," Hematite says crossly, which means that in probably about two minutes he's going to get nachos. "WHAT INTERSECTION?" he yells back at Kyouka, then unwraps his lollipop and sticks it in his mouth.

Meanwhile, the bird's getting quieter, finally, no longer big enough to get the airhorn blast decibels. It's about two feet tall.

Then Rashmi starts laying down the suppressing fire on the thing, and PAF PAF PAF in no time at all, feathers are swapped for plush and poly-cotton stuffing.

Meanwhile, Hematite watches the bakeneko shrink as it saunters over to him and flops down like catte -- everything always like catte, because catte -- and he sighs as he takes an empanada out for himself and his lollipop out of his mouth. It gets sleight-of-handed away, which means it'll show up later. "Keep better track of your cat, he says too loudly, then remembers to take his earplugs out, and then he winces at the car alarms. "She could have gotten hurt if Yellow Pearl Voice and Rashmi hadn't acted as quickly as they did!"

There's a pair of rubber boots and a stuffie toy that's seen better days in the Live Stage now, and some crushed cars and cabbages across the street, and everything's still in a barrier, so they're the only people around. It's perfectly safe to have lunch with everyone and not get spied on.

Hematite sits on the curb, empanada in one hand and sometimes mouth, playing 'don't get your hand clawed when rubbing catte belly' with the bakeneko. "Can someone crush those cars? The alarms are something else."

Jadeite has posed:
    Jadeite just ignores Zoisite's demands. Besides, Himeko brought lunch, so there. He holds out a hand and space-time warps around the cars, collapsing them into some other place as casually as one might open a door. Did the heroes know he could do that? They do now!
    Jadeite wasn't especially hungry, but he shrugs. "I could eat." he says to the ghost as he moves forwards to collect his meal. He silenced the alarms. He deserves a reward. And like hell is he letting Zoisite get the nachos before he does.

Naru Osaka has posed:
"Hmmm." Naru comments eloquently to Nephrite on the topic of energy, but then she turns and starts to softly laugh as Himeko bikes up. "Sometimes it's safer to just not question it all. Lunch sounds great." She moves closer to the collection of people who are coming to nosh on Mexican. "Thank you for bringing food, Himeko."

Yep, just another Tuesday around here.

Kyouka Inai has posed:
    Stellar watches Himeko ride up on her bicycle, with the mexican food and the sombrero. "Spooky ghost shit." She says knowingly to Nephrite, before he invites her to lunch. "You know this is the first time I've been asked out to lunch in like, four years?" She tells him, with a faintly depressed sigh. "And it's by you, of all people. Not that I'm reading anything into it, mind, it's just highlighting my lack of a social life. Do you have any whiskey?"

    To Naru, she asides, "You probably shouldn't routinely take food from the enemy, but I think in this case it's probably okay. Just be aware that I can't guarantee this mexican food is actually going to exist before we eat it so if you're hungry again in an hour it's probably because spooky ghost shit."

    She takes a burrito from one of Himeko's bags and ruffles the girl's hair on the way. Under the sombrero, which she replaces. Then she walks over to Hematite where he sits on the curb and says, "Do you want me to exaggerate this in the re-telling? I can say the bird was like thirty feet tall." Nomf burrito.

Coco Kiumi has posed:
Silence, finally! At least as far as the bird is concerned. Coco moves the Live Stage over to Himeko, letting her take the bird-plushie if she wants it. If not, she is going to have it make the rounds of everyone here until she finds someone who wants it.

"Apparently so. I would be down on that, I never actually tried them before", she confesses to Rashmi. "How are they?" Though she could do better if all those that were trying to coordinate would actually approach each other about this.

"Jadeite sounds very grumpy though, I think it would be better if we tried to get our own than rely on him." And then Himeko comes in with the lunch, so that's one problem down. "Thank you, Himeko, you are really dependable", she smiles at Hematite's sister.

That's accompanied by Nephrite inviting them for lunch, so it looks like they are all having a big meet up right here. What better way to restore one's energies? "Thank you, I am Yellow Pearl Voice, by the way", she introduces herself to Nephrite. Looks like she is about to meet the rest of the Four Heavenly Kings, not that she knows this, besides Jadeite.

Rashmi Terios has posed:
"Wait, Jade--" Rashmi blinks at Yellow Pearl, sloooowly turning toward the knot of people clustered around the ghostly Mexican buffet that is Himeko in an admittedly adorable sombrero.

The last time she ever *saw* Jadeite, he was exploding in her face."

There's a moment where Rashmi's face goes blank, mind whirling among polite options. "...Y'know what you go on ahead. If Naru-chan's not even looking annoyed, it'll be all right, and nachos are *really* tasty."

Turning to the party on the street, Rashmi waves a hand over her head. "I'd really love to stay and lunch but I think I left the oven on! Sorry, bye!"

Rashmi's Barrier Jacket does not have afterburners. But one could be easily assume that she does, given the level of NOPE she flies down the street with.

She does, at least, have the presence of mind to maintain the Barrier for a good while, to give people time to lunch in peace.

Mamoru Chiba has posed:
"Nah," says Hematite, then takes out... another fake silver crystal. And another. "It was a distraction so nobody would try and stop me from buying the Phantom Silver Crystal from a pawn shop. It wasn't real, of course. But," he adds, "if you stick enough of them in a bag they'd probably make a good sap."

He tosses one of the two to Stellar and then one of them to Naru with a little heads-up whistle. "I'm really curious what these are made of and why the're reading as magic when they don't do anything."

And then Rashmi's booking it out of there, and Hematite just watches her go-- and the barrier doesn't come down. She's so nice. He'll have to get her nachos at some point.

Pyrite has posed:
    Himeko accepts hair rustlings and praise, and beams happily for getting to be useful. She also receives scoldings. "I will try to do better Onii-ch--Senpai! ...Wait, which should I call you when I am Himeko? One moment, I will text you so the communication can remain confidential." Then she pulls out her phone from one of the bags, having to wipe the moisture off the screen from the steam of the hot food, and texts the person sitting, like, right there on the curb.
    Bakeneko accepts pets. She, unlike most cats, likes belly rubs. As long as they are gentle. She also happily accepts a fish taco when it is put down by her head.
    Himeko looks up in alarm as Book Girl takes off. "...Oh. Perhaps she does not like Mexican food..." she murmurs sadly.
    She will have to find out what that girl likes and make it up to her at another time.

Naru Osaka has posed:
Naru reaches up to catch the crystal that is tossed at her, as she comes up to join lunch at the curb. She considers the sparkly trinket and then tucks it in a pocket. "I am not the one to ask about magic reading you know." She points out with a little bit of a smirk to Hematite. "Although I mean, I can respect the fake crystals being magically purely decorative." She settles down to see if there's any vegetarian options, coming up with some chips and guac. "Are they like glamoured stones or something? Could just be a plain old rock that's magiced to be pretty."

Kyouka Inai has posed:
    Stellar catches the crystal tossed her way by Hematite, in the hand not currently occupied by Burrito. Though the burrito is rapidly becoming less and less of a hinderance as it vanishes into her maw a bite at a time. She eyes the thing for a moment, then lifts it up and sniffs at it, grey eyes studying its construction.

    Then she tosses it back to Hematite. "It's a magical construct, that's why. I don't know exactly what it's made of, but it was definitely made with magic, which is why it reads as magical but doesn't do anything. I think somebody is putting you on, chum."

    A pause, then she adds, "It isn't me, for the record. Pinky swear."

Nephrite has posed:
    Nephrite looks at the crystal as he carefully consumes nacho chips one at a time, like he's eating from some kind of delicacy platter. For all he knows, maybe they are. He is not very familiar with this type of food. "You wish to know who made those?" he asks with only passing interest. He has also gone for basic 'nacho cheese on chips' with the daring addition of black olives, which he would not ordinarily have chosen, but which Himeko did, so he is making do with what he has to work with.

    "I could tell you," he offers.

Coco Kiumi has posed:
Coco watches alarmed as Rashmi bolts it out of here. Should have she suggested to eat with her alone? Rashmi invited her first, and now Coco feels as if she ditched the redhead with no reason. She needs to make it up to her. Maybe either catch up with her at school, or bouncing by the Korma Chameleon.

"How many of those have you been buying exactly?" Coco asks as she stares at the fake Silver Crystal. Who is making these many fakes in the first place?

"Oh, hey Naru, you are here too? Everything alright?" Yellow Pearl Voice checks out with her, still a bit worried over the last time she was out in the field, so to speak. Really, she always find a way to get in somehow. "Have you recovered well from the other day's shooting?"

Mamoru Chiba has posed:
"Could be," Hematite says to Naru, considering this. His pocket buzzes and he hurriedly takes his phone out to answer Himeko, and eyes her as he types back.

    <PHONE> A text from Himeko Soryuu: How should I call you when you are in disguise and I am not? I do not know if I can become Pyrite any more, so this is a very specific situation to ask for help with, but it is important to know before someone suspects something.
    <PHONE> You text Himeko Soryuu: Whatever you like! Though I do like it when you call me niisan. Or niichan.
    <PHONE> A text from Himeko Soryuu: Then it shall be done.

And then Stellar sniffs one and he looks expectant. And then startled, as he catches it back. "Really? It's a construct that's persistent? That's... really cool, actually. I wonder what would make them break down, or if they even would..."

And then Nephrite chimes in and Hematite looks delighted all over again. "Oh please do," he says, and holds the crystal way up towards Neph so he doesn't have to get up off the curb. He has another big bite of empanada, and it's almost done and he'll have to get another.

"Any I find that someone else doesn't get first," he answers Coco, and then turns to stare at Naru. "...shooting? Again?"

Naru Osaka has posed:
Naru offers Nephrite some of the guac as she causally steals some nacho 'cheese' from his chips. "Apparently I'm doing a systematic evaluation of all the versions of the gun." She informs Hematite as she turns to give him a rueful smile in reply to that STARE. "Although if you guys could perhaps not make a version three, I'd appreciate it."

"I'm fine though, thank you for asking, Yellow Pearl. A little recovery boost helps immensely, and I'm grateful to have gotten that." Naru smiles warmly before crunching into her purloined cheesey chip.

Nephrite has posed:
    Pausing to accept the crystal, the Astrological Mage examines the construct. He is very skilled at connecting dots. He has here a magical construct created through spell magic, an energy signature he recognizes, and someone he used his magic to locate who was in turn thoroughly connected to a specific individual, who this magic corresponds with in turn. He tosses the crystal back to Hematite. "Sunbreaker." is the answer.

    "I used Triangulum to find Naru once before, when Sunbreaker was one of the triangulation points." He nods his head towards Naru. "Now she serves the same purpose for identifying the magical signature. I had to familiarize myself with Sunbreaker's magic when I was forming the Triangulum sigil originally, so I recognized it. Though without reference points it could have been mistaken for someone else..."

    Crunch munch nacho casually.

Kyouka Inai has posed:
    "You got shot again?" Stellar echoes Hematite, frowning at Naru. "Girl, we have got to get your some magic bulletproof armor or something. I am not going to get a favorable performance review if I let some of my favorite students get shot multiple times. I'm pretty sure that is listed under 'things not to do' in the guidance counselor handbook."

    When she hears Nephrite say Sunbreaker was the one making the fake crystals that have been driving Hematite up the wall, she barks a laugh. "Ha!" Then looks mildly chagrinned. "What? It's funny when ya'll get in each other's way."

Coco Kiumi has posed:
Coco looks at Stellar questioningly. "Performance review? Favourite students? Are you one of our teachers?"

Pyrite has posed:
    "You have a teacher? Are you a student too?" Himeko asks, having ferreted out Yellow Pearl Voice's secret through clever deductive reasoning! Good thing her own secret identity remains intact! Whew!

Coco Kiumi has posed:
"Oh, yes", Coco smiles at Himeko. "I go to the same school as your big brother, in fact!"

Mamoru Chiba has posed:
"Sunbreaker!" repeats Hematite, startled as hell. "I guess that makes some sense-- glad her trolling's not more fire."

Then he glares. "It's not *us*," he says to Naru, scandalized. "Guns are so crass. You know whose they are. We don't have any truck with them."

Then he grins at Kyouka. "It's excellent, I'll have to thank her someday. This almost makes up for the sensitivity training I had to do when I stabbed her."

Then he stands up and brushes himself off, looking for another empanada.

Naru Osaka has posed:
"I mean, I didn't walk up to Riventon and ask him to shoot me!" Naru protests. "This is why I didn't tell anyone!" She pffts softly at Stellar and Hematite both. "Besides, didn't even quite pass out, didn't lose my crystal. It's all good."

Which is probably just about in the same realm as Naru's 'This is fine'.

Kyouka Inai has posed:
    "You're weird." Stellar tells Hematite, but it sounds more fond than insulting. "Also you taking sensitivity training sounds like the most batshit overkill I've ever been told about."

    To Naru, "I'm going to have words with this Riventon next time I get a chance. Shooting people randomly is not allowed, this is Japan, not America."

    To Yellow Pearl Voice, she adds, "I'm not a teacher, no." Then, ruining it, "I'm a guidance couneslor."

Pyrite has posed:
    !!!
    "How did you know I had a big brother who goes to school!" Himeko asks in shock as Yellow Pearl Voice turns the tables on her!
    Then she looks over at Stellar as the latter admits to being a guidance counselor.
    The ghost claps her hands to her cheeks in utter surprise and amazement.
    Who could have seen this coming!? Not Himeko, that's for sure!

Coco Kiumi has posed:
What Coco remembers was Naru blindly stumbling around while she had to be protected by both her Live Stage and Chrono's wall of ice, AND she wasn't herself enough to worry about getting her soul back. In her realm, that's not quite all good. But ok, let's not pile worry on the others anymore.

"Oh, so that's who you are", Coco says as she puts 2 and 2 together. "Both me and Sailor Eris have been meaning to reach you about those self-defense lessons you had going on a while ago? Would you still be up to run them?"

"I was talking about your big brother going to the same school as me. But I guess we all flock at RHA", Coco grins at Himeko.